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The Muffin Man is seated at the table in the laboratory of the Utility Muffin Research Kitchen. Reaching for an over sized chrome spoon, he gathers an intimate quantity of dried muffin remnants. And brushing his scapular aside proceeds to dump these inside of his shirt.
He turns to us and speaks:
"Some people like cupcakes better. I for one care less for them!"
Arrogantly twisting the sterile canvas snoot of a fully charged icing anointment utensil, he puts forth a quarter-ounce green rosette near the summit of a dense but radiant muffin of his own design.
Later he says:
"Some people...some people like cupcakes exclusively,
While I myself say there is naught nor ought there be nothing so exalted on the face of God's grey earth as that prince of foods...The Muffin!"
Girl, you thought he was a man
But he was a muffin
He hung around 'til you found
That he didn't know nothin'
Girl you thought he was a man
But he only was a-puffin'
No cries is heard in the night
As a result of him stuffin'
Girl, you thought he was a man
But he was a muffin
No cries is heard in the night
As a result of him stuffin'